Well Kept Women
There are some women who are just naturally beautiful. They require nothing to have that flawless beauty. I have never thought of myself a in such a way. I was pretty a pretty feral child growing up. My kindergarten picture is a perfect depiction this wild little child. I was dressed in a red and gray jogging suit, which I am certain came from the boys clothing section at Walmart. I had on well used tennis and you would not dare catch a bow in my hair. I had beautiful curly blonde hair, which was usually untamed most of the time.
Was I hit the teen years I had friends in high school that wouldn’t dare leave the house without makeup and a perfect hair do. I don’t recall ever going through that phase at all. I didn’t really care how I looked and don’t do this day.
As an adult I jokingly often make the statement that I really only have two looks, homeless or not. Most days the homeless look rings true to who I am. I hate shoes, hated shows as a child and have no desire to wear them. I remember getting by at school with jelly shoes. Remember those? You could get them at Walmart for near nothing and it sufficed the “must wear shoes” rule that was required. I would wear them now if they existed and they probably do but I’ve transitioned into flip-flops most days.
As a mother I have seen my children go through those “phases” of having to be perfect before they left the house. It started with my oldest daughter who colored in her eyebrows. I can honestly say I never thought of such a thing when I was her age. We all gave her a hard time about every chance we got. Now calm down, it was all done in fun, no feelings were really hurt. She hated it for sure and jokes now that she was traumatized as a child LOL. As an adult she is gorgeous and no longer chooses to wear her caterpillars anymore. Haha. Her makeup is flawless every time she does it.
My son on the other hand, there is a boy who took forever to get ready. He is one of those pretty boys, you know the blonde hair, blue eyes kids with great skin, perfect teeth, and a great smile. He spent more time getting ready that the girl child through high school . I can remember them fighting over the bathroom. We were talking about this the other day when he was here and laughing about how picky he was then. In truth he is still just as particular as he was then.
The younger two girls.. thirteen months apart and different as night and day. The oldest of the two I knew would be a princess from day one. She began dressing herself as early as she could and never left the house with out her purse. She loved playing dress up and her time playing with her hair and all things girly. The youngest girl, my most feral child. She was wild from the moment she was born. No care in the world, hated shoes, one day hated jeans, the next hated jogging pants. I was never sure what would be the next argument we we might encounter when getting dressed.
The thing that bothers me most today is that no one is “okay” with how they look. Everyone is constantly trying to change their natural appearance. I really believe that social media has been the greatest influencer in encouraging everyone to change the way they look. The underlying result is now no one being comfortable in their own skin. Every where you look there is some advertisement to something better.
Don’t get me wrong, I have dyed my hair when I was a teenager. I also have had my hair highlighted a few times was an adult. So I get it, but its sad to me that everyone feels like they are held to this standard of appearance. Its the opinion of others deciding about how we should or shouldn’t look that holds us to this standard. Why in the hell does it matter what others think of us so much ? I can tell you why, because it is shoved in our faces and the faces of our children every time we turn around.
Every year people go through the new years resolutions, things they give up or make vows to do or not to do. Its great, have goals??? This year I gave up some things. I gave up wearing makeup, not like I really wore a ton before but hey its something, I also gave up wearing a bra, and shaving my armpits. Yep that’s right no more shaving this little devils. I mainly gave that up because no matter what I did I would get these big sores under my arm when the hair started to grow back. So to hell with it. Most people that know me are like well your blonde so no one can really see your hair. But who cares if they do??
Men feel this way too, but ladies I am speaking to you!!! I have been told so often by women, “ I wish I could be more like you” , or “I wish that I looked like whatever.” You can but first you have to let go of what makes you feel this way. People are going to judge you anyway, no matter what you look like or what you wear. I am just comfortable with them judging me these days, LOL. WHO CARES?!
There is freedom in being you. Please don’t misunderstand me and think that I am bashing or shaming you if love all the hair dying, fake eye lashes, makeup, whatever mess. I just don’t want to be shamed for not being all these things The world has made us forget who we really are, without all that stuff. People have learned to shape opinions about you based on physical appearances. There are so many people I talk to who are really so insecure about how they look and wouldn’t dream of going out without “fixing” themselves up. It hurts my heart because people are beautiful and they don’t even know because someone in the world made them feel as though they were not.
I pray this serves as a reminder that you are beautiful just as you are. The real, raw, unblemished by the world you. I am not saying that you shouldn’t have goals or want to improve in some way, but rather learn to love yourself exactly where you are, even if it’s not where you want to be. Set yourself free from the opinions of others and gain confidence that you don’t need anyone to remind you that you're beautiful but you.
Love & Light - H
