Empty Rooms

Ever since my children were little we have always has a bedtime routine, where I tuck them in and sometimes even lay with them. I was always thankful to be able to hold them at the end of a busy day. These days there are more empty rooms than children in our house. We are down to one, the youngest daughter of our family. 

My middle daughter has always been the most independent. The girl has been trying to leave the nest since she was old enough to crawl. She is beautiful, strong willed, and extremely stubborn. She is very much like her mother. 

I remember when the ultrasound tech asked me if I wanted to know if the baby was a boy or a girl. I just knew it was a girl. I already had her name picked out and when the lady confirmed what I already knew a loud, piercing squeal erupted from my body, so excited I couldn’t stand it. 

The largest of the three babies I birthed, with the sweetest little blonde hair and the chunkiest little cheeks, gahhh I was completely involve with her. I had all these ideas about her, how she would be and what she would “like” as she grew, but I quickly realized that she had other plans. She was extremely independent, with a very keen fashion sense, never leaving her room without dressing to impress. I miss the days of her princess dresses, little Cinderella high heels, and never without her purse.She became my built in best friend. 

The years have seemed to fly by, leaving those princess days like a distant memory. Time has turned that sweet little princess into a beautiful young woman and tonight my sweet baby girl will walk across the stage, closing out the high school chapter of her life. It’s unbelievable to me that time has gone by so fast. It seems like just yesterday I held her for the first time. Over the years I have briefly wondered what this time would feel like, ya know with all the children grown and starting their own lives. I honestly never thought it would happen so fast. 

I am not ready for this. 

I am not ready for her room to be empty.

I am not ready to let her go. 

Even though I am not ready, I know that she is and she will do just fine. I couldn’t be more proud of her. 

Letting your children go is hard. Like really hard. For some parent’s I suppose they are ready for their kids to leave the nest. I am not. I am not ready for a big house with empty rooms. I imagine that I will eventually get used to the quiet and even come to appreciate it someday. Until then I will hold all the moments I have had with my sweet girl, tucked deeply in my heart. I am thankful I have one more to go, so this is not the end !!!

Love & Light, Hannah